In my anguish I cried to the LORD, and he answered by setting me free. Psalm 118:5

Monday, April 18, 2011

My Spiritual Bucket

"Vessel" is defined by Webster's Dictionary as "a container for holding something." Sounds simple enough, right?

There are multiple examples of vessels in the Bible, both spiritual and literal, so let's reflect on two.

First I'd like to point you to the Book of Matthew. In Chapter 26 we are told the story of the anointing of Jesus at Bethany... "a woman came to him with an alabaster jar of very expensive perfume, which she poured on his head as he was reclining at the table. 8 When the disciples saw this, they were indignant. “Why this waste?” they asked. 9 “This perfume could have been sold at a high price and the money given to the poor.” 10 Aware of this, Jesus said to them, “Why are you bothering this woman? She has done a beautiful thing to me. 11 The poor you will always have with you,[a] but you will not always have me. 12 When she poured this perfume on my body, she did it to prepare me for burial. 13 Truly I tell you, wherever this gospel is preached throughout the world, what she has done will also be told, in memory of her.”

Oh, what I would give to know what this vessel looked like! This precious jar used to dispense perfume over the head of Christ must have been beautiful, no matter how plain it likely was.

Next, lets move to the woman at the well. We could delve deep into this scripture (John 4) and discover more about Jesus as the spiritual vessel here (because He is truly the vessel for our God, the Living Water), but I want to keep this simple. This woman most likely walked for miles to that well, in intense heat, to fill her clay jar with water, and would then return to her village to deliver this life-sustaining and thirst-quenching water to her household.

Now, jump with me back to our definition. If I may, I'd like to embelish Webster's definition. A vessel is not simply a container; it is also a necessary tool for delivery from one point to another.

If that treasured and highly valued jar of perfume had been cracked, the perfume would have never made it across the room to the head of our Savior, Jesus Christ. It would have been grossly wasted on the dirt floor.

Further, no woman in any third world country around the world would carry a hole-ridden cistern or vessel to the well near her village. Surely, after walking the many difficult miles from the well, the precious water would be gone before she ever returned home.

Do you know, friends, that you yourself are a vessel? God has anointed you in this life to hold His Holy Spirit. Even more, He has anointed you to deliver Him to others around you. Just like these tangible vessels, though, you too can be broken. Cracked. Incomplete. And thus, an ineffective tool for containment and delivery.

The beauty in this ugliness, though, is that a damaged or forsaken, unattended to vessel can be repaired and redeemed and restored (praise God!).

I am painfully, and thankfully, aware of the hole in my own spiritual bucket. I have given a great deal of thought to this perforation in my spirit lately, and I have struggled to understand what has caused it, and thus, how to permanently patch it up.

It was in church on Sunday, April 17, 2011 that the pieces finally came together.

Brett spoke extensively about God as an artist, the perfect creator of all things beautiful. He told us how God passed the paint brush on to creation (for me personally, this was my flute and my music, so I related deeply to his artistic reference), and that because of all this, we crave beauty and perfection. And then it clicked. The light came on.

I suddenly realized that my music as a young child was more than a "gift" God had bestowed on me. It was more than a talent he gave me to escape the emotional emptiness of my childhood. Before I ever knew I could have a personal relationship with Christ, He was seeking relationship with me through the music I spent so many hours practicing daily. Beauty. Perfection. It was what I craved desperately. All for a deeper connection to Him, and I had no idea. How amazing is that? He put the paintbrush in my hand so I could know Him better.

God still uses music to reach deep into my soul today. Though I haven't played in several years now, God has of course found a way. Intense harmony, a perfectly tuned chord, complex rhythms...it is all evidence of God stirring His spirit within me and drawing me to connect with Him. It is because of my heightened sensitivity to God in the music I hear that I am so easily touched by what I hear. How beautiful that God would reach out to me and spend time with me in this way.

I am a vessel for God and within me I carry His Spirit, His word, and His love for His people. If I have an unrepaired, gaping hole...a missing spiritual element, then I will not be an effective container, or an effective method of delivery. How can I take Him to others if I am broken? The painful truth is that I can't. I will waste Him on the perverbial dirt floor.

My extraordinary passion for music, even as a young child, reminds me that I am designed by God to crave Him. To be an effective holy vessel for God, I must place a permanent plug in this hole by seeking deep and lasting relationship with Him. No temporary fixes will do! Not food. Not Facebook. Not texting. Not my husband. Not my kids. Not my activities. Nothing but God can permanently plug this hole, and for me, that means deep, significant relationship with the Father who created all things and designed me to crave Him.

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